The Question

Posted on 3rd October 2011 in Fun with my son

Sunday is the only day that I wake up with a smile. It’s the only day of the week that I look forward to. We left the drop off and headed out for the day. I always ask, do you want some breakfast?  Lately he has bee saying no because he has eaten already. So then I ask “can daddy get some breakfast?” He said NO, I asked why, he said because I’m full”.  We went back and forth with that while we walked to get some breakfast. After getting my sandwich, we headed to the train. He said NO I don’t want to get on the train. I said well how about the bus? He said NO! with authority. So where are we going to go? He looked left and then right and pointed and said “this way”.  Off we went in the direction he wanted to go. After a few steps he wanted “daddy express”. I had to fuel up so we spent about 5 min with him grabbing my legs while I tried to get a few bites of my sandwich. At the station, I make him walk the stairs and he his getting better. Instead of pulling up the other foot, he is advancing his foot to the next step.

We walked around city hall with him leading the way. There was a D&D across the street and he wanted his cookie. In we walked; I asked for two oatmeal raisin cookies, was told they don’t have them at this location. I informed Ajani of this fact, “No I want my cookie” the girl behind the counter said “sorry no cookies here” he said “Oh OK” Luckily there was another one two blocks away. Cookie in hand, we set off to kill some time before heading over to his Uncle’s house.

When we arrive, he always greets his cousins with hugs and his uncle with a hand shake. Football, food, fun. Then it was time to go. Usually he’s asleep by now, but on the train ride back he was very talkative.

He started asking me questions. Are you going home? I said yes. He then asked am I going home. I said yes you are. Then he asked can you come home with me? He looked at me when he asked me that.

 I was not expecting that question for at least maybe another year. I really was hoping that the question would never be asked, that someone would come to their senses. The ONLY person getting hurt here is Ajani. For him to be denied his father is really starting to affect him.  Clearly his best interest is not being met.

I did not tell him the truth of why I can’t go home with him. What I told him was this. “Not This time but soon buddy, soon.

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